My earliest memory is of a hideous creature chasing after me in our driveway! I was about three years old at the time and new to this thing called consciousness. The mysterious critter was moving straight toward my bare foot, so I stomped on it with the very foot the life form was trying to strike. I didn't have a language for it at the time--but it was a spider!
A hideous creature lived inside me during my earliest consciousness too: anxiety. Like the spider, I had no language for it at the time. It affected how I thought, felt, and behaved--but it was a silent guest within my soul. Looking back, if I had the ability to self-reflect then, I would have assumed everyone was like me. How else could I have known differently?
I have a language now for the anxiety that lived within me during my earliest years. Actually, I should say anxieties--Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) and Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD). GAD characterizes my constant feelings of worry. OCD describes the pervasive, distressing, and unwanted thoughts that plagued my mind the older I became.
I didn't develop a language for these conditions until my early adulthood. A counselor at my college helped me understand OCD. Thankfully, after receiving Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT), most of my OCD tendencies subsided. Years after college I better understood my proclivity to GAD through some severe bouts of insomnia.
Today I am at a much better place thanks to the holistic approach I've discovered over the years. I have received much healing through my faith, lifestyle changes, and relational support. I serve today as a counselor for this reason--to be one small part of someone's life as they discover various ways that will help them toward experiencing healing and health!
Zach Lucas is a Licensed Professional Counselor for the State of Oregon.
He also teaches dual credit high school Psychology in the Portland area.
Feel free to contact him at: zach@choosewellbeing.net
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The information provided is for self-exploration only and not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any condition or disease. Always consult with a licensed professional who specializes in the area you are seeking to understand and treat.